Wanna know something about me…
I love pictures, a lot. Right up there with poutines and popcorn. The love is deep for me. In high school. my bedroom walls around my bed were covered in 4x6 pictures, so it should be no surprise now I have pictures everywhere throughout my house... although I must say in my opinion they look way better than the taped on the wall look I had going before haha.
There is a problem though with loving pictures like I do... when I was overweight I would either a) Not be in them or b) Just face shoots thinking I was hiding all the weight. There was trips we went on and there is hardly any pictures with me in them, and if I am, I'm standing so awkward trying to get behind something or angle myself so I look smaller that it's a ridiculous picture anyways. Not to mention my face shoots with my chubby cheeks were clearly fooling no one that I wasn't chubby in what wasn't in the picture.
So last weekend when I was creating my newest gallery wall in the basement of all the trips we have been on (with my new map canvas) it made me really sad that there were pictures I just wasn't comfortable putting up or I had to use somewhere that we went on the trip because of my weight. It's not just seeing me bigger that makes me sad, it's that person I use to be that makes me sad. That person I swear I will never be again.
What you might not realize is I didn't just gain weight in my pregnancy. After my wedding, the weight came on fast and before I knew it my weight was at 198. And after that I was really great at yoyo dieting with all the 'newest gimmicks' so I'd go down for a bit then shoot right back up, then down again. Then in my pregnancy, that's when it all got really out of hand and I hit 245 going into the delivery room. Truly, who knows what I would have hit if I didn't invest the time and energy into myself, who knows how much more I would have gained. That wasn't baby weight I was gaining... it was poutines and bags of chips.
This was me on a trip to Disney in 2011 before Penn (around 198 lb, so not even my heaviest) and a picture of me last week. Yes I know the weight loss is there... but more importantly I see a different me... a happier more relaxed, more comfortable me.
This summer I even promised myself I was going to be in more pictures 'doing things.' I have all these great 'action' shots of Penn and Lorne playing and doing great things but none of me and Penn. So all I do now is ask. I ask Lorne to take it or anyone who's around. (Trust me, this makes Lorne reeeeal excited but its important to me so he deals) So I challenge you to do the same... try and be in more pictures with your little ones! Take a moment and ask your husband to take a picture of you colouring with them, or running around in the backyard, the action shots always end up my favourite shots so I bet they will be yours too!
I hope you all have a fabulous week!
-Chandell